Snapped

So I just about had enough today.  While walking to work, I snapped at three people.  This was a surprise as when I left my hotel, I was like I am not going to be bothered, I am not going to be bothered. As I got to two blocks, a man kept looking at me.  He was looking at me from afar and when I got close he was still looking at me.  So I stopped beside him and I was like “Yes?” he looked at me surprised and realized that I was talking to him because he was looking at me.  He then put his head down very quickly.  I was shock of myself. And I was thinking, what have I done? Why did I even do that?  Two seconds later, the same, I stopped beside a guy and asked him what he was looking at?  He did the same.  Then I was thinking to myself, oh my gosh! What is wrong with me?  I should not let them bother me.  But then a block later I actually stopped and just looked at a guy while he looked at me as well. He also realized what was going on.

Now I am not sure why I did that, but of course I know why because I was tired and sick of it.  It is out of my character to have let this bother me, but of course I have expressed in every blog that I am very much bothered. 

I got into work and I felt disappointed in myself that I lost control. But I guess it was bound to happen.   I spoke to my mother, who happen to call me and I expressed what I had done.  She informed me that it solve anything and they would continue to look at me. But I knew this already and I continued to act the way I did. 

I expressed this to my work colleague and he said at least all I did was asked them what they were looking at.  He has done far more worst.  Either way it does not excuse what I did.  However, I must admit that I had some sort of satisfaction out of it. 

After work I walked home and well the stares were the same. No! I did not snap at them. While walking to my hotel, saw a restaurant and I walked in.  The restaurant is called Highway 4, very nice.  The waiter after staring at me for a while decided to make conversation with me. He was a nice guy and I attempted my best to speak slowly.  He understood me and I the same. 

After dinner, I went to my hotel and later went out with Ross, the guy that I met the night when I got lost, you know the “English Gentleman”.  I just wanted to get out of my hotel a little so we went to a restaurant.  We had a good conversation, more or less what he was doing here and how long he has been here. It is nice to meet someone outside of my work. 

I got home late and I went to sleep

Oh I hope this does not happen again